Today I can't cope...

What has happened to me in the few short hours since I went to bed (well maybe long hours, I like my sleep!) I've woken this morning and I am a quivering wreck and I don't like it.

I feel out of sorts, out of control and can cry at the drop of a hat. The silliest thing has set me off today. Got a call about my company car mileage. I maintain I did it before I left for the operation, but something has gone wrong. Either I imagined I did it, or something happened when my manager left and it hasn't been approved.

Either way, its not a big deal...but it feels it.

I got a letter from the bank saying I needed to contact them asap as they hadn't been able to reach me. I call, I'm on hold for 7 minutes 'sorry please ignore, the letter was sent in error' My blood is boiling....but why? It's not a big deal, mistakes are made, no harm done....but I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders and I can't cope.

MrC is being lovely, really supportive. He has been brilliant (most of the time!!!) while I have been recovering. But why is him giving me a hug, a little kiss on the back of my neck when I least expect, a little squeeze of my hand sending me into an emotional wreck?

So I have a choice, and you know how I like choices. To give into these feelings which are making want to curl up into a ball, sleep for a week and cry like a baby or put it down onto virtual paper send it out into the bloggerverse, get my head down and crack on.

Because realistically, I will feel better later, something will make me laugh and put it all into perspective

But in the meantime thanks for the therapy session



4 comments:

  1. Ah you poor thing. We all have days like that. Sometimes I wallow for the day, eat chocolate and drink tea in my Pjs.Sometimes I put my make up on and meet a friend for lunch..diversion tactics. Don't be so hard on yourself. Tomorrow is another day.Big, big hugs xx

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  2. Hi Fay. Know how you feel. But after what we've all been through in the last 12 months or so, we're still here and still fighting...Keep up the good work - you're looking good and will soon be feeling fine! Hugs xxx

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  3. Anytime... Hope you are feeling better again now. xx

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  4. Blogging is just the best therapy. I have days like you describe and that is just me, not having been through something as traumatic as you have.

    Hope you are back on form. Mich x

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